Just Got 2 Tell

Anything & Everything I Feel Compelled to Share with the World!

God will answer January 18, 2013

Lately I’ve been convicted over and over regarding my pining for a husband, not just a husband, but the one that God has been planning for me since before I was born. God is a planner, an awesome planner, and I do love to look for His hand in things. I love that even when the first sin occurred God was already revealing parts of His plan to us for restoration to Him. (Yes, I get sidetracked. A lot.)

But friends and others around me are getting married and having children. Others are in relationships. Some I admit I feel no jealousy toward at all, but some do make me yearn and wonder when it will be my time.

Only God knows how many times I have given it over to Him. Again and again. The reason I have to keep re-giving? Because I keep taking. I let Satan worm his way into my mind, believing him when he says I’m all alone, I have no one. That I am incomplete without that ring on my finger. In the garden Satan convinced Eve that God was holding out on her, that there was more for her outside of His will for her, that it would be better if she took control of her life and made her own choices. I do NOT want to fall prey to Satan any longer. I will not search for my own way, search for my own romance, my own husband.

This morning as I felt the longing for marriage again, it hit me. Really hit me. Whenever I find myself pining for that man, for that human relationship—intimate & good and godly as it may be—I am telling God that He is not enough.  In that moment, I’m telling Him that His love for me is not enough for me, that I need more.

And as I confessed this to Him, and asked forgiveness, He answered. Not the answer that many would expect to hear, but an affirmation that I was/am heading in the right direction.

How did He answer? Two songs back to back on Pandora.

“None but Jesus” by Hillsong United

There is no one else for me.
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

and then “All I Need” by Shawn MacDonald

All I need is Your love
To come and fill this heart of mine.

All I need is Him. All we need is Him. Nothing else. Nothing but Him can make us whole. Nothing but Him can make us complete. Only God and His love can fill the longing, the cravings, the desires that are within us. Because that is how He created us, to need Him, to long for Him. To crave Him.

 

Proverb 31 Woman, who could possibly be? January 2, 2013

Filed under: Christianity,God,Jesus Christ,Love & Life,Spiritual Growth — Anna @ 11:15 PM

Let’s see if I can get something coherent from my minds ramblings. Sometimes when I’m thinking on something, something I’m not so sure of, or not certain how to interpret, understanding sometimes just washes over without being in clear words or coherent paragraphs. Trying to get a handle on the Proverbs 31.

This woman described in Proverbs 31 is busy, from pre-dawn to most likely post-dusk. We know she sleeps at some point, as it says “she rises early” thus she got a few winks of sleep. She buys land, plants vineyards, makes clothing, cooks for her family, gives to the needy, etc. She does SO much. But I think it’s also important to look at what she doesn’t do or doesn’t have in order to see the correct context.

She didn’t have TV, cable/satellite, movies, computers, internet, sports, team practices, phones (much less cell phones), or books. Now please do not think I am trying to suggest throwing these things out and living a simplistic lifestyle. There are good and bad things with each of these advances in society, but think of the time each of them take up. How many TV shows and movies do we get caught up in? How long do we spend chatting, emailing, browsing facebook? How long are we on the road traveling each day?

This woman would have most likely traveled by food, therefore never traversed as many miles as we trek daily in our SUVs and compact cars.

There were no books. Scriptures and other writing was done on scrolls. These were not available in every home. There were no weekly Women’s Bible studies. No Beth Moore, Angela Thomas, Kelly Minter, or any of those. She wouldn’t have spent the time that we do, or are told we should in personal Bible study. I’m not saying she didn’t have quiet times, or prayer time with God (though it’s not explicitly stated And which do you think is more important, studying God’s Word or making a dress?).

She wasn’t concerned about foreign affairs, missions in lands she’d never go to. She didn’t worry about the rising gas prices, health insurance, college tuition. She wasn’t able to encourage a friend living 3,000miles away or pray for people/situations outside of her immediate circle.

It seems like she does so much and yes she does. But what do you do? Everyone of us do a lot. We live in a busy an hectic world. We are constantly pulled in multiple directions, our attention needed by work, friends, family, spouse, children. We wake with ‘to do’ lists running through our head and probably never make it to bed with those lists completed. We read Proverbs 31 and think “wow this woman had it all together” and don’t you think that’s exactly what Satan wants us to think?

Isn’t it just like us as women to get a glimpse at another woman’s life and think she’s so much better than us? Our own insecurities and failures keep us down so much, we forget that the other woman and ourselves are equally and immensely loved by the same God, no matter what our lives look like.

How much do you want to bet that if she actually existed that Proverbs 31 Woman would have thought she was failing drastically in some aspect of her life (if not many other areas)? I think that’s in our nature, to always be striving for more. In a way I know that’s how God made us. He wants us to strive for more. More of Him. He wants us to want more of Him. We are imperfect people in an imperfect world, loved by a perfect God who tells us ‘be holy for I am holy’, who calls us to follow Him. Therefore we strive to do more, to be better.

We can and we should aim to be better, but we will never attain perfection. Not in this lifetime.