Just Got 2 Tell

Anything & Everything I Feel Compelled to Share with the World!

God will answer January 18, 2013

Lately I’ve been convicted over and over regarding my pining for a husband, not just a husband, but the one that God has been planning for me since before I was born. God is a planner, an awesome planner, and I do love to look for His hand in things. I love that even when the first sin occurred God was already revealing parts of His plan to us for restoration to Him. (Yes, I get sidetracked. A lot.)

But friends and others around me are getting married and having children. Others are in relationships. Some I admit I feel no jealousy toward at all, but some do make me yearn and wonder when it will be my time.

Only God knows how many times I have given it over to Him. Again and again. The reason I have to keep re-giving? Because I keep taking. I let Satan worm his way into my mind, believing him when he says I’m all alone, I have no one. That I am incomplete without that ring on my finger. In the garden Satan convinced Eve that God was holding out on her, that there was more for her outside of His will for her, that it would be better if she took control of her life and made her own choices. I do NOT want to fall prey to Satan any longer. I will not search for my own way, search for my own romance, my own husband.

This morning as I felt the longing for marriage again, it hit me. Really hit me. Whenever I find myself pining for that man, for that human relationship—intimate & good and godly as it may be—I am telling God that He is not enough.  In that moment, I’m telling Him that His love for me is not enough for me, that I need more.

And as I confessed this to Him, and asked forgiveness, He answered. Not the answer that many would expect to hear, but an affirmation that I was/am heading in the right direction.

How did He answer? Two songs back to back on Pandora.

“None but Jesus” by Hillsong United

There is no one else for me.
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

and then “All I Need” by Shawn MacDonald

All I need is Your love
To come and fill this heart of mine.

All I need is Him. All we need is Him. Nothing else. Nothing but Him can make us whole. Nothing but Him can make us complete. Only God and His love can fill the longing, the cravings, the desires that are within us. Because that is how He created us, to need Him, to long for Him. To crave Him.

 

Purity Ring May 23, 2012

Filed under: Christianity,Love & Life,Singleness — Anna @ 5:24 PM

On my left ring finger I wear a ring. A simple silver ring. It has been there for years, since somewhere around 2002, so that would be a decade. Now the original band, the one saying “TRUE LOVE WAITS”, that one had to be replaced. Don’t ask me how, but somehow, somewhere, I lost it. I replaced it. The new one reads “I am My Beloved’s My Beloved’s is Mine”, referencing Song of Solomon 6:3. It is not an engagement ring, not a promise ring. I was 15 years old in 2002; it is now 2012 and I am almost 25. I would hope that if I was engaged or promised to someone ten years ago, something would have become of it.

It is a purity ring. I guess I assumed it was a more common thing, at least among the Christian community. When I got the first one, it was something just about all of the girls in the youth group did. I made a commitment to purity, to abstinence until marriage in 6th grade. But this was a ring, a physical, near constant reminder to that commitment I had made to myself and to God to preserve my body and heart for the man I would someday marry.

For years I never got any comments about the ring. Maybe the one that read “True Love Waits” was pretty obvious, many had at least heard of the True Love Waits program. Maybe as I get older, it’s more possible or likely that I am married. But in the last year and a half, I’ve been asked three times if I was married. The first time was this guy in Hardee’s, which was odd, but it didn’t really shock me.

The second time was a classmate in a class I took at UNC this past semester. Also didn’t shock me, and I very much enjoyed the opportunity to talk to her about my beliefs. It always shocks me the response I get. “That’s cool or a good thing to do.” But you can tell they’d never think of choosing that for themselves as if it’s too difficult.

But today shocked almost irritated me. Maybe because she didn’t take the time to see it or see what it said but automatically assumed. Maybe it’s just because I’m not a fan of the person that asked due to other reasons. But it bothered me that she automatically thought that this stone-less ring was an engagement ring and gave me this shocked look when I said it was a purity ring, as if she’d never heard of such a concept, even though I know she was brought up in a Christian home.

But why is purity so often considered such a lofty, unattainable goal? Why is it so often seen as something we should all do, but very rarely is it done? This is even among the church. It seems that when I tell people I’m saving myself for my husband I get 2 responses. These are responses I get from Christians and nonChristians alike.

“That’s great.” Said plainly that’s a good encouragement, but so often I also get the ‘but I could never do it’ (said or implied). It’s like they are setting me up on this pedestal, often thinking I’ve got a ‘holier than though’ attitude, even though I don’t do anything to give that off.

The other response is ‘are you serious?’ I got that response from Christian friends when I told her I didn’t believe in high school dating. That’s another post on another day, but she got all defensive.

 

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” – Proverbs 4:23

 

Time Flies When You’re Having Fun May 20, 2012

Truthfully, time flies no matter what, except when you’re waiting. When you’re waiting, time creeps. It’s true no matter what you’re waiting for, water to boil, the microwave to finish heating up your lunch, a doctor’s appointment, to move, a new job, Mr. Right to come into your life. But there’s one thing I’ve learned about waiting. When you’re waiting, you’re not doing anything, just waiting. You may be sitting or pacing. Or in the case of moving, a new job or Mr. Right, you may be going through life, but your mind is preoccupied by what is to come. For a long time that is what I’ve been doing, mainly in the case of Mr. Right. I know in my head that God will bring him along in His timing, and for the most part I believe in my heart that His timing is perfect. But that doesn’t stop me from that longing to be married and have my own family.

So would you like to know the remedy for waiting and that annoying fact that time slows down when you’re watching. Do Something. It’s that simple. When you’re busy doing things you enjoy, you don’t realize how fast the time goes. For instance at the doctor’s office? Bring along a good book, or there’s of course your smartphone fully equipped with ever-addicting games like Words with Friends & Angry Birds. In December my best friend bought her first house, and it was decided that we’d be housemates, only we weren’t moving in until June. Okay, so that’s a pretty long time. In the meantime, I’ve seriously been crazy busy with work, school, church, to boil it all down: I’ve been busy living. And now, we’re counting down the days. Everything is falling into place, and I can’t believe June is almost here. I also cannot believe the first class that I was the lead teacher of is about to graduate in less than two weeks.

I still haven’t been able to prove that it works with Mr. Right. But this I do know. God never intended for us to sit around waiting on Him to move. He never intended for us to sit around and watch life go by. He wants us to live, to have life to the fullest.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. —  John 10:10

Take this to heart. If you’re sitting around waiting on something to happen to your life, then you’re missing how God wants to change your life and how He wants to use you to change your world.